In the weekly office hours I host for my author community, invariably someone will raise the subject of blurbs and how to get them. These are writers and authors with forthcoming books who know that they need to solicit other writers and authors for words of praise—and a lot of people dread the very notion of doing the ask.
Last week, one of the writers was fretting a bit about the prospect of asking a big-name author, and I said what I always said: “Go for it!” Then another writer piped in and shared, “I’m going big!” She talked about how this book was her one shot, and she was going to give it her all.
There was a palpable energy this Go Big author brought to our Zoom call. I’d call it confidence—as if she’d reached through the screen and touched each of the other women in the room with a little bit of magic dust. We can do big and bold things; sometimes it just requires getting out of our own way.
The number one thing that stops us from doing what we say we’re going to do is ourselves—and nowhere is this more true than in our writing. And personal writing even more so.
It’s so easy to hedge before we’ve even been rejected. We pre-write the “no” in our own heads, which can then lead to inaction, and certainly breeds fear of rejection. And if you already know it’s going to be a no, why bother asking at all? I see this constantly with blurbs, but really I see it everywhere. I see it when writers start to question why they’re writing at all. In effect, we become our own gatekeepers long before any actual gatekeeper enters the picture.
The Go Big author’s energy was contagious in part because she was unapologetic. She talked about her one shot, and she shared what was true for almost every author in the Zoom room—that she’d been at this a long time, that the project deserved her time and attention and BOLDNESS.
She wasn’t dismissing the fear or rejection, but rather reminding us all that it doesn’t matter. You can’t get anywhere if you don’t take the next step. You can’t get something from another person if you don’t ask. She was going to ask the biggest name she could think of, and if that person said no, she’d ask the next one. And she wasn’t going to see anyone’s no as an indictment of her own work—which is the part that most resonated with me.
It’s been a many years since my 2017 TEDx talk, but my core message is around what it takes to say yes to yourself. To green-light your own work. At its heart, it’s about having the confidence in your own work to see you through the writing, then through the rejection, then through the decision to publish on your own terms, and through staying the course when other people don’t blurb you. And on and on and on.
The journey of becoming an author is joyous and painful at the same time. No one escapes the highs—you got your book published, you landed a big blurb, you secured an amazing review; or the lows—the exposure, the bad review, the disappointment of people not showing up for you, not selling as many copies as you’d hoped.
Importantly, finishing your book and putting it into the world is a major feat. For each book, whether you publish one or ten, you get one shot. I love Hamilton, so I’m closing on this inspiring video of the cast doing a spontaneous performance in New York City. Be like my Go Big author and give it your all. Take inspiration from Hamilton and don’t throw away your shot!
We’ve got a couple more spots in Page to Pitch to Submission.
And save the date for our zero-cost Pitchapalooza!!
Weekly Prompt
Write an experience you’ve been afraid to put in your manuscript—the true, big one you keep talking yourself out of. Now write the version you’d write if you already knew no one was going to reject it. Read them both aloud. What happens?
Weekly Question
What was a time in your life when you went BIG? What did you do and what was the outcome. Please share!
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Kwame Alexander and E. Jean Carroll on the Power of Staying the Course
Happy August, Memoir Nation! As is our custom, we bring you our favorite guests of the past year, partnered by theme. This week we chose Kwame Alexander and E. Jean Carroll, both of whom have seen major personal victories in the months since we originally interviewed them. Kwame Alexander launched his own imprint, Kwame Alexander Books, and E. Jean Carroll finally got her settlement money from Trump. These two guests are exemplary of how to face the hard stuff and keep going—all the way to the top. As we say in the show opening, it’s as if their interviews are in conversation with one another—and neither one fails to inspire. We’re wishing you good summer writing and good summer reading, and we hope you enjoy our Year 8 “best-of” series.
Kwame Alexander is an Emmy® Award-winning producer of The Crossover, his Newbery Medal-winning novel turned Disney+ TV series, the creator of the new animated PBS special Acoustic Rooster’s Barnyard Band, and the new head of Kwame Alexander Books, an imprint of Sourcebooks. His mission is to change the world—one word at a time.
E. Jean Carroll is a journalist and longtime advice columnist best known for her column “Ask E. Jean” in Elle, which ran for over 25 years. She is the author of Not My Type: One Woman vs. a President, about the two sexual abuse cases she won against Trump, twice, and for which she has subsequently received a $5.6 million payout. Her high-profile legal victories against Donald Trump have elevated her as a symbol of resilience and truth-telling.
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Grammar Girl’s Quick and Dirty Tips for Better Writing
Mignon Fogarty, aka “Grammar Girl,” was one of our first podcast guests and she’s a dear friend of Memoir Nation. She knows grammar like …someone who has hosted the most popular grammar podcast since basically the beginning of the internet. Take her class to brush up your grammar—and learn how grammar can shape your sentences and thoughts.
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So true and if you are already giving yourself the green light to publish why wouldn't you make it the best you possibly can with people saying how fabulous your book is!
Love the message and the inspirational video, lifted my spirits 🥰